For many years, I have had an insecurity about my speech. I sometimes cannot think of what it is I want to articulate. When I get excited about something, I tend to stumble over my words and stutter. At times, I speak extremely fast. It was an ongoing joke in my family that my older sister was the only person who could understand me and she was needed to translate. I get very nervous when meeting new people. I'm talking about unbelievably uncomfortable. Because of this "impediment," I shy away from people and would much rather stay to myself or those closest to me.
I recently had a conversation with my sister. I explained to her that I had attended an important meeting. I could not formulate the words that I wanted to say. I got so frustrated with myself. I jokingly told her how I feel like Moses. If you are unfamiliar with the story of Moses, read the book of Exodus. Moses was a Hebrew who was not only raised by an Egyptian, but by the daughter of Pharaoh, the ruler of Egypt. Moses' own people, the Hebrews, were in slavery to the Egyptians. Many years later, God told Moses that He chose him to lead the Hebrews to freedom. Moses told God every reason why he shouldn't be the one to lead his people. After all, he had a stuttering problem and could hardly speak.
How could he be the one to tell people to follow him? Not only was he to find the courage to tell people follow him, he had to be bold enough to stand up to Pharaoh to tell him to let his people go! But what Moses was reminded of was God fully equips who he chooses to use. Just like Moses had to be reminded of God's abilities, so did I.
When I told my sister that I relate to Moses with his stuttering, she responded with, "Well, is that a bad thing? Do you remember what God used Moses to do?" Light bulb! I was so hung up on Moses' speech all while neglecting the fact that when it was all said and done, Moses had led his people to the Promise Land. Pharaoh and his army had been defeated. God had entrusted the people of Israel to Moses.
Could you imagine how scared Moses could have been? Here he is standing up to a dictator that could have him killed at any time. On top of that, there were some Hebrews that were so afraid to follow Moses, that they'd rather stay in bondage. If Moses had not done what God told him to do, the Hebrews would have never gained their freedom and Moses never would have fulfilled his purpose.
So I guess it's all about perspective, huh? I am like Moses, but not because of my speech. I have an assignment to be carried out. So do you! Do not be afraid to live the life God has for you. He has equipped you. Isaiah 41:10 says, "So do not fear, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my victorious hand." If that's not encouraging I don't know what is! You are able to do anything through Christ Jesus!
You are fearfully and wonderfully made! Always!
